stacking stones

When I went running today, I was wearing my new cairn necklace 

that Dad and I got from an artist in the Methow Valley named Nicole Ringgold.  

This is what her website says about this work of art: 

"Cairn is a man-made stack of stones. It comes from the Scottish Gaelic: càrn. Cairns are found all over the world in uplands, on moorland and mountaintops, near waterways, on sea cliffs, and in barren desert and tundra areas.

Today, cairns are generally erected as landmarks. Throughout history, they have also been built as tombs, or used for defensive, hunting, ceremonial, and other purposes.  The artist hand selected the rocks along the banks of the river by her home. Then she hollows out and drills the rocks.

River rocks symbolize strength, age, wisdom, and earth." 

Dad and I have several little cairns set up on our dresser in our bedroom of rocks that we have collected on special trips together.  If a drawer is closed with too much force or if something bumps against them, then I have to stack them again.  The simple practice of stacking them on a regular basis reminds me that our relationships take constant rebuilding with patience and care and intention. 

These stones also remind me of the Ebenezer stones that we have created at different points too. 

I Samuel 7:12 says, “Then Samuel took a stone and set it up between Mizpah and Jeshanah, and named it Ebenezer; for he said, “Thus far the LORD has helped us.” 

He was erecting a stone to remember the Lord’s help, the Lord’s blessings, and the Lord’s faithfulness after a time of trial and hardship.  Ebenezer is a combination of two Hebrew words that means “stone of help.”

As I was running, I tried to use the time to remember 5 things recently showing God's help, faithfulness and blessings, and it was good to remember God's faithfulness in our lives. 

This necklace will certainly be a symbol to me of God's help along the way... not just showing me what He does for us, but also reminding me of God’s Never Stopping, Never Giving Up, Unbreaking, Always and Forever Love at every step. 

My prayer for you, sweet Anna, is that you will stack some stones this week taking the time to count the ways God has shown you his faithfulness and love. 

don't forget to stop and smell the flowers

When I got home from my run on Sunday, I joked with you and Taylor that 17 miles just seemed to be a ridiculous number of miles to go run on a Sunday morning.  The good thing is that I had a few women to run with so it went by pretty quickly and they kept me going. 

Along the Burke Gilman trail, they and these signs at an intersection. 

On Interlaken, there was an owl that we spotted too! 

My prayer for you is that as you go through your day today that even when you are feeling like you are going full speed ahead with your school routine, homework, reading, flute practice, etc. that you would not forget to stop and smell the flowers. 

celebrate and savor and give thanks. 

As the deer...

Sweet Anna,
On Friday when I went running, I looked at two different prayer calendars that I have before I set out and used that to guide me to pray for you.

One of them had Psalm 42 to be praying for you on Friday:
As the deer pants for streams of water,
So pants my soul for You, O God.
2 My soul thirsts for God, for the living God.
When shall I come and appear before God? 

Know that I prayed that you would long for God and thirst for Him as I was running and panting around Green Lake myself.... 

housing thoughts

Libby Chapman read this quote to me yesterday and it is my prayer for you today as you grow and wonder sometimes "What on earth is God up to?" with some of the growing pains... 

“Imagine yourself as a living house. God comes in to rebuild that house. At first, perhaps, you can understand what He is doing. He is getting the drains right and stopping the leaks in the roof and so on; you knew that those jobs needed doing and so you are not surprised. But presently He starts knocking the house about in a way that hurts abominably and does not seem to make any sense. What on earth is He up to? The explanation is that He is building quite a different house from the one you thought of - throwing out a new wing here, putting on an extra floor there, running up towers, making courtyards. You thought you were being made into a decent little cottage: but He is building a palace. He intends to come and live in it Himself.”

― C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity

painting that you, Taylor and I did in 2008 

been there, done that...

Today, I ran to SPU to drop off some mail for someone and then headed back up Stone Way (the street where Dance Fremont is located) to come home.  The last time I had run up that hill from Lake Union up to 45th was in the half marathon that I ran just after New Year's Day.  It's a long slog going up that hill as there is not a break for quite a while.

But the thing that I thought about as I was running today was that I had been there before. I knew I could do it and would be able to knock off each bit by going one block at a time.  Been there, done that.

I was praying that as you face some hills that are ahead of you that you will be able to say with confidence: "been there, done that" to those challenges that will come and just take them bit by bit.  As anxiety creeps up, you can look back at times you have been able to regroup and take some deep breaths to gain some perspective.   As you look for deeper friendships and deeper faith, you will face some ups and downs, but it is my prayer that you will learn from your experiences and run up those hills with all you've got.

Weighing you down

As I ran on Saturday, one of my stops was to the grocery where I picked up a few groceries for the week. I crammed them all in my running backpack and then tried to run home (but sometimes it felt like a shuffle).  Needless to say, with about 10-15 lbs in my backpack with a big bag of rice, 2 large cans of black beans, tomatoes, pasta, etc, I was not going as fast back up the hill to our house as I was going down the hill to the store in UVillage.

As I ran back home, I thought about what things might be weighing you down at times and prayed that God would help me and Dad help you navigate that.  Whatever it is-- anxiety, pressure you put on yourself, pressure you perceive from others (whether it is there or not), expectations of others or from yourself, what others think about you, feeling tired and worn out, etc-- may you learn to take that backpack off and let someone else carry it for you for a while or just ditch it all together...  May you understand the grace of the verse below and learn to live freely and lightly by keeping company with the Lord...

Matthew 11:28-30

“Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.”

a letter for you

  

  

pictures from 2010 

Last night, Dad and I watched the movie Boyhood, a story of growing up as seen through the eyes of a boy name Mason.  What was cool about it was that it was filmed with the same cast over a period of 12 years so we literally got to watch Mason grow up over time, but it was at times a very depressing movie because his family was full of incredible brokenness.  So this letter that I ran across from Maggie Paulus spoke to me as I was reflecting on the film and thinking in particular about raising Anna and Taylor...  As I run this afternoon and as we continue to walk this road together as a family,  you can be assured that I will be praying these things for you today...


"Dear Children,

This momma of yours sometimes lies awake at night worrying about the world and about you and how you’ll grow up here.

There are these moments when I’ve read the latest headline on the news that I want to lock the doors and all the evil out and try my best to protect you from everything wicked and wild.

I wish you could only know about blazing sunsets and fishing ponds and old barns down dirt roads and kitties and good people that call you friends and a society that’s safe to live in.

But things are broken here, and there’s some things I need to tell you to keep you soul-safe.

I want the light in your heart to stay on when the world around you gets dark.

There’s a God who is good, who does love you and who’s got this whole world in His hands. But there will be days when it won’t feel that way. You’ll look around and sit numb from the pointlessness of it all and grasp for answers, knowing full well sometimes there are things that happen here you will not understand.

Keep praying to the God I’ve told you about. Because when we pray, we reach out and grab hold of Someone real but who can’t be seen.

There will be aching nights when you will struggle along, feeling around in the dark, searching for some notion of grace in this fallen world.

And I want you to hear me—God is here. Right here. And when you run hard after Him, determined to find Him with a little speck of faith, He will show up. Every once in a while you’ll be able to feel Him— the warmth of His light-bearing face.

I know, my loves, you’ll have your doubts.

The voices around you and sometimes in you will try to reason God away.

Clouds of unbelief will hide from you what’s there.

Cynicism will come looking for you, to hunt you down.

You’ll have to do war, my loves. You’ll need to turn around and look at that sneering unbelief in the face and scream the truth you’ve got tucked down deep in your heart. You’ll have to kick doubt to the curb, babes, or it will cling to you.

Remember it’s sin, not God, that broke this whole place.

The ground groans. Stars catapult in revolt and trees travail like a woman in labor pain, bent over and gasping for her next breath. Creation reels for all that’s been lost and waits with this eager longing to be set free and restored to her rhythm of rest once again (Rom. 8:19–24).

You’ll wonder why you’re here.

Just keep running to your Maker and He’ll whisper it to you again, because it bears repeating. That you are light and couriers of His love, and this is how He chooses to help the world—through your actual hands.

Your very feet. He’ll shine out through your eyes and His joy will show up in your cheeks and in your smile. You, His kingdom children, will demonstrate to the world a different way.

And when you’re afraid about your life, remember God knows the number of your days (Ps. 139:16). He’s with you in every single one of them.

Don’t forget, you must never forget, there is a forever after this. One day light will split through all these cracks and God’s righteous kingdom will reign. Forever.

There will be no more sickness or dying, and all that’s sad will come to an end. You’ll hear it then—how the mountains will shout for the everlasting joy being born, the thorns in the thickets will no longer grow, and all the trees in the field will clap their hands (Isa. 55:12–13).

So long as I’ve got this breath in my lungs, I’ll remind you of these things.

And I’ll help you see that though the world is broken, still it’s good.

There’s beauty here and God-glory all around. I’ll take you by the hand and we’ll go hunting. We won’t stop looking until we find Him here. Together we’ll trace the outlines of His ways.

As long as you’re here with me, I’ll keep getting up and stumbling through the dark to check on you while you’re fast asleep.

And even when you’re grown and gone, I’ll still carry you around in my heart and chase you with my prayers.

You’ll always have your momma’s prayers, my loves.

Today, I’m praying for your peace." 

                 

pictures from 2011 

playlists

This morning on my run, I had a list of favorite songs of an "ultimate workout playlist" featured in the Oprah magazine.  The playlist was put together by Angela Davis who has quite a resume: 

"As a member of the USA Track and Field Team, Angela was a 5 time All-American who held world rankings at the 100m. She ran track professionally for Nike, was an Olympic Trials semi-finalist and a member of the World Championship team." 

One song I really liked was called "He's a Pirate" by Ship Ahoy Tribal Remix and another one I loved was called "Thank You" by Third Party. 

Here's what she said about these songs:  

"He's a Pirate (Ship Ahoy Tribal Remix)"

Chris Joss and Klaus Badelt, 4:46

I guarantee you will love this electronica song. It has the sickest drumbeat! It sounds like a march, which is what you need when you're pushing super hard. 

"Thank You"

Third Party featuring Loleatta Holloway, 5:47

I love infusing gratitude into my sessions. When I feel like I can't go any further, a reminder that I should be thankful for the breath in my lungs gives me a burst of energy. 

The thing about having a playlist is that it certainly can give me a spring in my step and kick my run up a notch.  I'm thinking for the marathon in June that I will bring an iPod for the first time in a race and have a playlist with me for this very reason.  

I was thinking about how we listened to the song with the words from Psalm 139  yesterday afternoon in the car when you were feeling crunched for time in getting out the door for dance.  That song helped change your frame of mind and eased your spirit.  

I am praying, Anna, today that you will always have a song in your heart that can help you push the reset button and that will give you the burst of energy when you need it. 

hug often

I ran over to Erica's house today to take some flowers to Christine (Elizabeth's mom) who was there babysitting Greta.  (there seems to be a theme here lately of running with flowers.) :) 

Just last Friday, her husband (and Liam and Micah's step-grandfather) (Elliott) died, and everyone is still in shock from the news.  We sat down together for a little bit and she shared a bit more about her last week as she has been reeling from the whole thing. 

She has been married to him for the last 8 years and she said they have been some of the happiest 8 years of her life. Everyday when she would come home, he would greet her and say, "Hi beautiful!" and he was a man who was full of fun and joy and life.  

I loved hearing some of these things and we just sat there and cried together as she shared some of her memories.  As I left, she told me to take care and to HUG often. 

So, tonight I am tucking you in, know that I am going to be hugging you with a tighter squeeze giving thanks that we have today together trying not to take these moments for granted. 

My prayer for you today is that you will hug often and

 embrace those God has given you with love and gratitude.  

friendship

The air was crisp today but the sun was out for another day as the colors were showing off in the spring.  As I ran down to Green Lake soaking up the sun, I thought and prayed about your desire for deeper friendships.  I remembered praying this fall about that in particular and having a picture of planting the bulbs in our yard.  

Now those bulbs have bloomed into beautiful daffodils, crocuses and tulips.  But, it took time for those roots to grow and for the winter to pass.  We could not see what was happening underground, but there were significant things going on that made the fruits of spring possible now that we are enjoying. 

I am continuing to pray for this longing of your heart, Anna.  As the seasons come and go, I am praying for deep roots and for kindred spirits to blossom in your life.  

Know that I delight in you and that those who will become a part of your circle of friends will be so very blessed.  

a quote above from Anne of Green Gables 

running buddy

Just a note to say that I love to run with you... 

(on the beach, in a dress, as a giant kiss, or as a larger than life doughnut) 

explore and invest

We were all a bit jet lagged from our red eye on Wednesday night, but I rolled out of bed and decided to head out for a run. I started to head south on Folly Beach to see what I could find and went as far as I could go on the island that direction.  I then turned around and headed as far as I could the other direction north.  The route turned out to be a bit longer than I expected, but at least I knocked out my long run for the weekend. :) 

As I was running, two words came to mind for you. 

the first was EXPLORE....

I was praying that as you carry on in this life God has given you that you would make the most of every opportunity and EXPLORE in this vast world... 

love the blue dot showing me where I was at the end of the island. 

I came across a bunch of starfish at some point on my run and threw one back in the ocean for good measure in honor of this quote: 

“Once upon a time, there was a wise man who used to go to the ocean to do his writing. He had a habit of walking on the beach before he began his work.

One day, as he was walking along the shore, he looked down the beach and saw a human figure moving like a dancer. He smiled to himself at the thought of someone who would dance to the day, and so, he walked faster to catch up.

As he got closer, he noticed that the figure was that of a young man, and that what he was doing was not dancing at all. The young man was reaching down to the shore, picking up small objects, and throwing them into the ocean.

He came closer still and called out "Good morning! May I ask what it is that you are doing?"

The young man paused, looked up, and replied "Throwing starfish into the ocean."

"I must ask, then, why are you throwing starfish into the ocean?" asked the somewhat startled wise man.

To this, the young man replied, "The sun is up and the tide is going out. If I don't throw them in, they'll die."

Upon hearing this, the wise man commented, "But, young man, do you not realize that there are miles and miles of beach and there are starfish all along every mile? You can't possibly make a difference!"

At this, the young man bent down, picked up yet another starfish, and threw it into the ocean. As it met the water, he said, 
"It made a difference for that one.” 
― Loren Eiseley

So in light of that quote that came to mind, my second word that I have for you from my run is INVEST... 

May you invest in the people God puts in your path and know that what you do matters. The way you love people matters and will make an impact on them.  You truly are the light of this world and I want to encourage you to shine that light everywhere you go. 

I wish you had been here with me when I took this picture, Anna, but you were fast asleep!!! 

The other end of the island had a lighthouse waiting for me. :) 

beach run while you were still catching up on sleep! 

and p.s.

HAPPY 13th today!!! 

against the wind

Today the wind was CRAZY. See this picture below for a glimpse of what it was doing earlier in the day as we arrived here in Folly Beach, South Carolina.

When I went running at 5 pm on the beach, it was NUTS.  As I was running, the sand was whipping against my legs and I was going much more slowly running against the wind. It was just a reminder to pray for you for strength when you feel like you are running on a treadmill and not going anywhere in life with whatever comes your way.  May God give you the grit to press on and enjoy that wind in your face and the sand in your hair knowing that soon enough you will have that same wind at your back and the road will get easier. I'm cheering for you, Anna!

and I love the joy you have in exploring and playing!! 

a light in the dark

Today has been a nonstop day with teacher observations in Renton, a meeting at SPU, teaching my final class tonight and then trying to get home to finish packing before our redeye flight to Charleston, SC for Abby and Jens' wedding this weekend! 

Since it was going to be such a full day, I got up early to run and headed out the door around 6... 

The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it. John 1:5 

my headlamp (worn on my waist) this morning thinking of the light at the end of the tunnel, 

and praying that indeed the light would shine in the darkness for each step ahead for you... 

Yankee Doodle and Gratitude

As I left to go for my run this afternoon, you were getting out a bowl of cereal for a snack, and I overheard you singing the blessing that goes to the tune of Yankee Doodle. 

"We thank you Lord for daily bread

for rain and sunny weather

We thank you Lord for this our food

and that we are together

Thank you, thank you, thank you Lord

Thank you, thank you Father

Thank you Lord for this our food 

and that we are together." 

That was going through my head as I was running and it was fun to pray through that song and give thanks to God for each of these things. The other thing that I was thinking of was that you are so much in the habit of saying a prayer before you eat (whether it is singing this song or "God our Father" or another fun song in our repertoire)...  While we all do this at dinner together and it is a habit for us as a family, sometimes if I am just grabbing a quick bite, I forget. But hearing your songs remind me to thank God for these gifts of our daily bread.  I love that about you Anna that you are one that remembers to give thanks.  

That is what I took time to dwell on while I was running. I simply prayed that you would continue to be a person of gratitude and that others would be reminded to give thanks because of you.  May these roots of gratitude continue to grow deep so that this habit of giving thanks that has started as a little acorn would grow into a beautiful oak tree. 

Gratitude really is contagious and I want to thank you for spreading it my way today.... 

harness

A couple of weeks ago when Heather Fosth was staying with us, after I had shared briefly with her about some of the conversations you and I have had about faith and doubt and friendships over the last few months, she told me that she had a picture in her mind as she was praying for you. She imagined you on the edge of a cliff with a harness on.  You had the chance to repel off the mountain and jump.  She wanted to encourage you to go ahead and take that step off the cliff because you had that harness on. It was going to hold you securely and keep you safe.

That harness is a picture of God's love. It will hold. You may feel like you are all alone and are falling, but the harness will hold.  You might feel scared and insecure, but it will hold.  You may feel frustrated because you can't see God who is belaying you on that rock, but He is there and that harness will hold.

He's got you in the palm of his hand and his love is strong enough to hold....   That picture of the harness has been on my mind the last few days as I've been running and praying for you. May this truth continue to sink deeper into your heart, Anna. :)

rejoice

I'm on a roll this week with running with flowers in my hands.... 

Today as I was running to Green Lake, I spotted a bouquet of flowers that someone had stuck in a fence on the side of the road on the Ave.  It looked like they'd been there overnight so I grabbed them and brought them home for Dad to wish him a happy birthday! 

When I was running around Green Lake, I was listening to a playlist that had the song from Randall Goodgame's CD "Sing the Bible". My favorite song on there is where Sally Lloyd Jones reads the verse from Philippians 4 with the mandolin playing in the background.  A big smile flashed across my face as this came on, and I picked up the pace with a spring in my step.  I prayed that you would be able to live into this verse today and rejoice... 

4 Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! 5 Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. 6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. 8 Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. 9 Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you. Philippians 4:6-9

I made a video for you of some favorite pictures that remind me to rejoice... 

http://youtu.be/OG5y2aYeXYw